Right here in GLCC, maybe you are here because you know we are looking at the subject on family relationships. Last week, we began on focus on the family by looking into marriages.

We as a church believe, Christianity is not just about coming to church services on Sundays, it's a way of life and according to the teachings of the Bible, Christianity first, should be lived out in our families, in our homes. And so, last week we focus on marriages, because, that's the basic, fundamental, foundational relationship in any home. Today, we are continuing to look at marriage. So, if you today are married, there is something for you. If you today are not yet married, I also say, there is something for you, because you have got to know what marriage is about before you enter marriage, you enter with your eyes open right, and so today we're going to look at marriage and to start off, and again customary,, we'll begin with a little video clip, so, enjoy.

00:01:09

Eng Chuan :
I think, the primary purpose for marriage to be, for marriage, is not procreation, but companionship

Winnie Lee : and then, the second purpose of marriage is to reflect Christ and the church on earth, to be an example of that relationship.

Siew Yean : people need to see that Christian marriages are different, to point to these unbelievers that you have God, you have His power to guide us, to becoming the husband and wives that He wants us to be.

May Lim : we do show God's glory in our lives and how two different people get along and could just work together for God's glory.

Kay Hong: for Christians, the purpose of marriage is to demonstrate God's love, to demonstrate the relationship between Christ and the church, so, for husbands and wives, the marriage, there is no way that we can be separated.

00:02:31

And so, today, we're looking at marriage once again. Now, do you remember how we began last Sunday, do you remember how we started last Sunday, what was the key statement, anybody remember? Wah, this is, if you are new with us, this doesn't usually happen alright. (Laughter in the congregation), I hope it doesn't, yes.

Marriage is difficult, okay you have got it, the concept, but maybe the exact words, if we can. Marriage is really, really tough, and only Jesus is enough. All right, not bad, you guys, give yourself a round of applause, give these guys a round of applause.

That's true, marriage is really, really tough and only Jesus is enough. Now, we recognize that there are things people write about like happily ever after, a perfect marriage, but in reality, these things don't happen. And, it's because, marriage is between two very different people, we have different desires, we have different perspectives, different opinions, different styles of doing things. And so when two different people are in a same relationship, often times, friction arises and is not just that we are different people, we are very sinful people. We are deeply flawed, we are deeply insecure, we have our baggages, we have resentment, we have hurts, we have frustrations, we're sinful, we are wicked, we are selfish. So, you put these two persons together, it is a perfect recipe for disaster. And if that is not enough, you add some more practice externally, such as the devil, the Bible talks about how the devil wants to get into your marriage life. You have pressures in the world, you have pressures at work, no wonder, a perfect storm is always brewing in a marriage.

For any marriage to work out, it takes nothing less than a miracle of God. That's why, marriage is really, really tough and only Jesus is enough. If you're here today, we want to share with you, this is not a marriage counseling thing, this is about pointing you to Jesus, so that you may really have success in your marriage for the glory of God.

00:04:44

The question now is, if marriage is so tough, you know, some of you may be single and after last week's sermon, you may say wah, I think, I am not cut out for marriage. If marriage is really, really tough, then why marry?

Have you ever asked yourself why you should be married? Or, why are you married? Have you asked yourself that question, why am I married today? How many of you are married, can I see again, just raise your hands, if you're married? Let me ask, why are you married today? Why? Because Bo Pian (meaning Can't be helped) (Laughter in the congregation), I am stuck with him or her. But, if you ask yourself, why are you married today, what would be your answer be, can I have a few answers here? Or why are you looking to get married? Both would be appropriate. Reasons for marriage, companionship, alright, if you need a companion, so you get married, good. Any other reasons? Have a family, meaning have children, alright, you want children,, that's great, you can't have children apart from marriage if you are Christians. Any other reasons for marriage? Love, alright, you hear people say love keeps it going. Love, children, companionship, anything else? In the first service, I have people tell me, HDB flats (government housing) (Laughter in the congregation). Creative answer and because I am getting old, or reasons like that.

Well, why do you get married, you have got to be very clear and in the Bible, it does tell you some reasons, let me share some reasons with you and than share something that most of us don't quite realize.

00:06:24

One reason for marriage, is exactly what the first reason, partnership or companionship, rooted in Genesis 2 that says, it is not good that the man should be alone, I will make him a helper, fit for him. So, very clearly, marriage is designed by God to provide companionship, friendship, help, mutual help, one to another. Besides partnership, there is also procreation. So, it is God's will that through marriage, we would be fruitful and multiply, Genesis 1:28. Besides that, we see Psalms 127, "Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb, a reward." And also, in Malachi, that God seeks a godly offspring.

00:07:11

So, these are verses that give you a basis for, reasons for marriage. So, one is partnership, companionship, friendship, help. The other one is procreation. Another reason that we may be a little bit shy to talk about, is pleasure. The Bible, speaks of it in Proverbs 5 where it says, let your fountain be blessed and rejoice in a wife of your youth. In 1 Corithians 7, it says, but because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman, her own husband. So, marriage is also for pleasure, sexual intimacy. It is not a dirty thing, it is not a filthy thing, to even talk about sex, because the Bible says in Hebrews 13:4, that marriage is to be held in honor among all and that the marriage bed be undefiled.

So, there is nothing dirty as I have mentioned or immoral, to talk about sex in a marriage and I think, in the church, we need to know that and understand that and so, somewhere downstream, I am going to preach about sex in marriage and please don't feel that it is R-rated in the pulpit and so on and so forth. It is biblical, it is found in Scriptures and we need to help people know the truth so that our people today will not go into falsehoods and lies.

00:08:37

But, here it is, these are some of the reasons of Scriptures, you have partnership, you have procreation and you have pleasure. Of course, you can add on to that pressures of the world. There is a certain pressure, that people sense that if I'm single that somehow, I'm not quite there, not quite accepted. Now these are extrinsic factors that we impose on ourselves. But these three reasons, listed here are found in the Bible, in Scriptures.

But are these reasons, sufficient for marriage? You may be getting into marriage because of one or a combination of these. But once you are in a marriage, is this enough to sustain you in marriage. What I mean by this is, if one day, your spouse, your husband, who you married, because you felt that he would satisfy you, or he would be your companion, what if he is one day, strickened with stroke or dementia and there is no way, you can have kids anymore, you have no kids and there is not much pleasure to talk about with a man like this or a woman like this. Can you imagine your position, you are stuck with someone demented, bedridden, unable to respond to you? What would be your reason to stay on? I mean, if these reasons fade and go away, would you say, well, because, he can't meet my needs or she can't meet my needs, this is not good for us, is now working out, I would call it quits.

00:10:20

These are reasons that can be very fragile and if your marriage is built upon just this purpose, these reasons, it may not stand the test of time. I am suggesting to you, beyond what we regularly would think of as reasons for marriage, there is something far deeper, there's something far grander, there is something far more important and I give this as the fourth P, the fourth reason and I think, one of the most neglected but probably the most important reason for marriage is portrayal. The word simply means, marriage is to be a demonstration of something, marriage is supposed to be a picture of something, marriage is supposed to represent something far bigger, grander and more beautiful than just my relationship with my wife or my husband. You say, what is marriage supposed to be a reflection of?

00:11:21

In Ephesians 5, Paul reasons:

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
(Ephesians 5:31-32 ESV)


So, in a very amazing way, when you see a young man and a young woman, get together in a wedding ceremony, you are saying something that represents how Christ and the church are going to be united, it's a deep union. Our marriages, are supposed to be pictures and demonstration of the gospel of Jesus Christ. It's a grand thing, it's a cosmic thing. It lifts your marriage from just being human to being divine. There's a sacredness, there's a divinity in our marriage, because it represents not just us, it represents, God and His church.

00:12:29

Therefore, as a key statement today, I just want us to understand what this means. Marriage, is when mystery of the gospel becomes, majesty through the couple. As you come in to church today, you realize, in our foyer, they are banners, one of it, contains the words, "Focus on the family", The other has the words "Where mystery becomes majesty."

You say, what is the mystery? The mystery is God's love for His church. The world by and large doesn't know know the love of God for His church, but it is seen, it is supposed to be demonstrated in our marriage. That's where the mystery of God is seen in something majestic, glorious and grand, through my relationship with my spouse. You say what keeps me going, when my wife is bedridden, what keeps me going, when he becomes demented. This is what keeps it going, I am, we are demonstrating to the world, the love of God in Jesus Christ in His gospel.

00:13:39

Let me break it down because this may still be a little bit chim (meaning, deep), too abstract so let me put it down into three simple things your marriage is supposed to represent and how this is referring to the gospel.

1. The gospel and our marriage is supposed to demonstrate sacrifice.

The way I love my wife is to be sacrificial and the sacrificial love for my wife is supposed to depict and represents the way Christ loved the church and sacrificed for the church. This is not my own understanding, this is from the Scriptures.

"Husbands, love your wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,:

So, Paul is saying as the way, just as how Christ loved the church, you are to love your wife so that when people see the way you love your wife, they will see how Christ loved the church. So, the way I love my wife, in a very little way, it points people, to a deeper, grander love of God for His church.

00:14:52

So, husbands, you play the role of a representative of Christ when you love your wife. What it means then, as husbands, as man, as heads of our households, we're not to abuse our wives, we're not to use our wives for our own advantage. We're not to say, because I am the leader, I am Tarzan, and you are the doormat. Isn't that how we think, God calls me to be the leader, so, everything centers around me. No, the Bible says, if you are to be Christlike, you center your life on your wife, you love her, you meet her needs.

Because, this is what love is, love is patient, love is kind, love does not envy or boast, it is not arrogant or rude, it does not insist on its own way, it is not irritable or resentful. You see, it is not about me, it's about her and this passage is so apt, this passage is about how Jesus emptied Himself for the church, how He became a servant and this is exactly, if you look at it, it exactly can apply to a husband.

00:16:02

And he is not to take his headship, his leadership as an abuse to enrich himself but he is to use his headship and leadership to bless his wife, that's the way Christ loved the church. It's to be giving, is to be confronting our own selfishness. One thing I know being a man, is that we are very selfish and I am talking man as males. I don't believe that there is no selfish males here. All of us, husbands, whatever, intrinsically, we are very selfish, we are thinking about myself, my needs. Decisions we make, if we are not conscious, if we are not walking in the spirit, generally we want things to revolve around us.

00:16:48

But the life of the Christian, in the home, is supposed to be a sacrificial one, giving of ourselves to our wives. It means, you give up your time, it means, you give up your interests, you love soccer, you love them in turn, you love whatever, in may be that God wants you to give it all up because of your wife. A bit tough, right? I mean, for you to buy a rose, by and by, okay, go for meals, you enjoyed it anyway. But, if she asked you to give up something, if she needs you to give up something, would you be able to give up? So, that's where the rubber meets the road, in a relationship, it's always easy to talk about love until you have to pay.

00:17:34

My son was playing in a kind of a playground, with some kids and one of the kids was a taxi driver, I mean, he was in a car, pretending to be a taxi driver, my son wanted to get on and he says you got to pay. My son asked, how much? He says "A thousand dollars." He says, okay, here you go. I was saying, who in the world would pay a thousand dollars for a taxi fare? But for kids, when they are imagining, and when they are playing, it doesn't make a difference, because they don't have to pay. And it is easy, I guess, for us to talk about love as a husband, until you have to give up something.

00:18:13

When you have to wake up at 3 AM to take care of your baby who is crying, who is the one to change the diapers, if you have to be the one who has to sacrifice your interests for the sake of the home and we all as men, we struggle. But you see, the point is that you look to Christ. Why should you love your wife this way? Is it because she's lovely and deserve your love? Maybe, you would think so on the wedding day itself. You know, on your wedding day you are top form, both of you look great, excellent and you look at her, she looks at you, and you say we could love each other for the rest of our lives.

00:18:55

But let me tell you, your top form is your top then, and after that, you would go downhill. Give it another fifty years, he would not look the same, she would not look the same, they would not be the same, but would you still love each other? You see, I think, the Bible tells me as a husband, I love my wife not merely because she's lovely because if you love her because she's only because she is lovely, there will come a time when she is not so lovely to you, do you stop loving her? According to the Scriptures, I love my wife not because she is lovely but because Christ loved me and I am supposed to depict, portray and demonstrate this love.

00:19:44

So, some of you say, pastor, you don't understand, you don't know my wife, she's horrible you know, she nags at me, every day scolds me, I go home she nags, nags, nags, I cannot take it, how can you expect me to love someone like her? I don't know your wife. (Laughter in the congregation) It's true, but I do know my God, I do know Christ and your motivation to love is not rooted in herbut primarily in Jesus.


00:20:17

There is this song, we used to sing, it's called "My song is love unknown", By Samuel Crossman, have you heard of that?

My song is love unknown,
My Saviour’s love to me;
Love to the loveless shown,
That they might lovely be.

Can I repeat those words again?

My song is love unknown,
My Saviour’s love to me;
Love to the loveless shown,
That they might lovely be.

So, what is he saying?

He is saying, I have this song, about a love the world doesn't know, my song is love unknown. What love is this? My Savior's love to me. And what kind of love is this? It is love to the loveless shown. Yes, we are sinners, we are absolutely unlovely, yet Christ loved us, when we were unlovely. Reason?, That we might lovely be. You notice the order, it's love to the loveless shown that they might lovely be.

00:21:25

So, Christ loved us while we were yet sinners so that we can become lovely. But today, the way man thinks is that we love someone, because he or she is lovely. No, the love we have for our spouse is to be the same kind of love Christ has for the church and that is, He loves us unconditionally. And this love changes us.

00:21:51

Look at this, He says that He might sanctify her. Why does He gives himself for the church, why does He die for the church so that He might sanctify her, set her apart, so that He might present the church, the glorious bride to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing that she might be holy and without blemish.

00:22:12

You know why Christ loved you? Not because you are lovely, but to make you lovely. He loves you till you are lovely. You know how you love your wife? Not because she's lovely, okay, she may be, and she should be (Laughter in the congregation), but not merely because she is lovely, but you love your wife so she becomes more and more lovely. That's what it is.

00:22:45

In other words, you don't return evil for evil. You don't say, this is the way you treat me, this is the way I would treat you in return. You don't return, harshness with harshness. You don't return anger for anger, but you treat her with tenderness, with tender words, with tender hands, with tender speech, because, that's the way Christ loved us. It means, as man, you don't use your wife for yourself. You know as man again, I think it's okay for me to disparage man because I am man, I will not do that for ladies, alright. But as men, we don't grow up, okay I know you men are unhappy but, I think we men don't grow up, we are very spoiled and bratty actually. We are such self-centered, bratty people, I am talking about myself, okay, is not you, it's me (Laughter in the congregation). Self-centered bratty people, because, if I don't get my way, my default mode, is to sit in the corner and sulk and pout and make sure everybody knows I am unhappy.

00:23:46

But man, we are called to love and not to take from the family, but give to the family so that I will step in, in love, in headship, in leadership. This is the way, Christ loved the church, to make us lovely.

00:24:12

Look at the wife, and you know how to the husband treats her, that's, that's true. So, I want to say to you, husbands, you may be in a very difficult relationship today, your wife can really be unreasonable, I am not ruling that out. But let it not be because of her, let it be because of Jesus, because it is in this toughest of relationships that the gospel shines through. You see, what gives the marriage going, again I say, is not because of procreation, pleasure or partnership, they can be great gifts, great blessings along the way but what keeps it going, is that realization my marriage is supposed to be a portrayal of the gospel. This is where mystery becomes majesty.

00:25:02

I have spoken enough to men, it's only fair that I speak to ladies and so, here we go, submission.

The other way, by which a marriage reflects the gospel, is not just between Christ love for us as a church but it's also how we as a church submit to Christ and therefore, correspondingly, how a wife would submit to her own husband. Now, I know submission is difficult. Some people say, don't talk to me about submission, submission is for dogs. Really, that's how people think today. They are modern independent women who feel there is no way I'm going to submit to him, my education is higher, I earn more money, I'm more capable, I change more diapers, I cook better, you know, in every way, I am better than my husband, so, don't tell me about submission.

00:25:50

No, no, no, you submit to your husband, not because he cooks better, or he's smarter or he earns more, but because of the gospel. You submit to your husband, because that's the way God is going to be seen, the gospel is going to be seen in your marriage. Now, this is not a occasional teaching, it's throughout the Bible, it's often times repeated. Ephesians 5 tells us why, wives submit to your husbands, as to the Lord, it's very clear and then he says again, in verse 24

00:26:20


Now as the church submits to Christ, see, the marriage is supposed to reflect that and the wife submission, is to reflect the gospel. So, as the church submits to Christ so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Everything! Wah, this is really very tyrannical you say, this is like a dictatorship. Well, it's not, it's about the gospel and you do it not because you are forced to but you do it because you want to and you want to, because Christ did all that for you, He died for you. And you value the value of the gospel far above your convenience, and therefore you say, I am going to endeavor to submit to my husband, even though, in my mind, he may not be so worth it, but Christ is worth it.

00:27:10

And I will submit to my husband until I think my husband is worth it. It's a choice, not a feeling.

Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Goes on to say, let the wife see that she respects her husband. It's important, men are wired to need respect, just as women are wired to need love, and so, submission includes respect and honor. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, 1 Peter and he says, "For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands,"

1 Peter 3:5
For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands,

You know, wives, you spent a lot of money to buy earrings, buy necklaces, buy clothes, buy shoes, buy cosmetics, buy supplements, save the money, work on this. Okay, I'm not saying, you totally don't wear anything, but this is the priority, the chief beauty, is the heart of submission, a wife who respects the husband and submits to her husband, this is of great beauty, both to God and to the men. And let me say, this is difficult to do isn't it, difficult for a wife to honor and respect her husband, I think it is difficult. I can almost see your faces here, and I can look at the husband beside you and I can think, I can probably get in your mind and say wah lao (as in wow) submit to him ? Tough!.

00:28:47

This week, there was this article in your voice, you can take a look at it and it is about sister Siew Yean, and deacon Eng Chuan, and I just took an excerpt out of it for you to see, it says,

After understanding that men were created to need respect, I prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to humble and teach me to submit to my husband happily, not just submit unwillingly but happily to encourage him to become the spiritual leader at home and support him in his church ministries so that he can become the person that God wants him to be. I grew, you know, there is a choice and you grow as a result of those choices, I grew to be more submissive instead of wanting to control and resist.

Let me say this, I don't think it's easy for any wife to submit to your own husband, why? Because wives are sharp, I think women are sharp, you guys, no, you gals are really good at looking at details. By the way, I am generalizing of course, men are a little bit careless, ladies are very good at details, you look at the little things and so, when you look at your husbands, in close quarters, the way he is lazy, in the way he throws his socks, the way he bochap (couldn't be bothered) and when you see the person in close quarters, because you are sharp, you pick up all the faults, it stays in your mind and you like to pick up those faults because you can also use it as ammunition when you quarrel. So, you collect them, stored in your mind (Laughter in the congregation) and you won't let go lah, of course. But when you record all those things, it doesn't help you to want to honor and respect your husband. So, it is really difficult, let's listen to some testimonies again and how they endeavor to live out the marriage, both in submission and in sacrifice.

00:30:42

Winnie : I think, the role of a wife as being a helpmate, but I think that to mean as being very supportive in all the things that my husband wants to do, be it at home or at work or even in church. It's not just removing obstacles, but supporting him such that he can go further in whatever he does.

May Lim: I have to be submissive, and what does it mean to be submissive, is to respect my husband and respect has to come from the bottom of my heart and truly see his good points and falling in love with him to think that he is awesome.

Winnie : My personality finds it very difficult to submit but I think that, having him in that, having God in that position of leadership, allows me to submit more easily.

Kay Hong: I need to know how to love her and how to die to self, surrender my rights, surrender my preference, my selfish, selfishness to meet her needs, to make time for her.

Winnie: And I think similarly, I felt from him is that because of God, Jason is more caring, he is more patient with my feelings as a wife.

May Lim: Just realize that in everyday life, the things that he does to my life and the way he shows love to me, just lots of practical things. It's not that you have to wait for some big things to happen and then you realize that, wow, I married a good guy.

Kay Hong : It's regardless of how she treats me, is not about you submit to me then I will love you. It's about how am I going to follow Jesus, by Jesus who died for the church.

00:32:43

Kay Hong ended by saying, "Is not how she treats me, is about how Christ has died for me."

And is the same, for how the husband should love his wife and also how the wives should submit to her own husbands. So, I say to you dear wives, oh, no wrong word, wrong way of addressing you (Laughter in the congregation). I say to you, who are wives, alright, be careful about the rising of contempt in your heart, be really careful about it. It's like a poison. The moment you start to disrespect your husband and you allow yourself to go deeper that, that is a contempt, a disgust towards your husbands, you may start to think he is a no gooder and you know what you will do, you start to share, please pray for my husband, he is a useless type. You know what, when you say things like that in your care group, with others, you drive a wedge, you allow the devil to come in to disrupt your marriage.

00:33:45

As they often say in the past, "Have contempt for contempt". Do you have contempt for your husbands today? Have contempt for that contempt, be disgusted that you are disgusted with your husbands, it ought not to be, it ought not to be. He may deserve contempt, I do not know, but Christ, deserve your contempt for contempt. It's Christ, that's why you respect and honor your husband because, Christ put him as the lord and leader of your family. Be careful of resentment brewing in your heart. Be careful of embarrassing your husband in public. Be careful, you always want to pull him down, when actually, the Bible tells you to build him up, to support him, to encourage him. Submission, is unto the Lord you see. Again, you may say, pastor, you do not know my husband. Yes, I do not know your husband, but I know the Lord. You submit as to the Lord.

00:34:45

This forces us really, isn't it to go to Christ? I mean, there is no other reason why, there's no other greater power, to enable us to be the kind of husbands and wives that we ought to be.

Lastly, I want to share with you, the third reason, why marriage is when mystery becomes majesty. I want to tell you why, how else can marriage depict the gospel. Firstly, we saw that it was about the man's love for the wife, secondly, we saw how the wives should submit, thirdly, it takes both parties and that is in the area of steadfastness. The marriage, depicts the gospel in its longevity, in it's unending nature on this earth, in its permanence, in its inextricable union. By the reality that we are covenanted and committed to each other. You see, Paul says again in Ephesians 5:31 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, that is the word to cleave, to stick and the two shall become one flesh. It's something that is deep, is like totally inseparable. And Paul is saying, marriage is to be totally inseparable. It is to be permanent, it is to be lasting. It is so linked that you cannot separate it, that should be marriage, why, because that's the same way Christ loved us and will never separate from us. That's why God hates divorce, because by force is a gross misrepresentation of the gospel. Every family, every couple is to attest to the glory of the gospel, but when we divorce, we are saying, this is not, we are misrepresenting Christ love for the church.

00:36:43

So, he says, we need to cleave, we need to stick together, that's why your vow is for better or for worse, till death do you part, as long as we both shall live. Why, because there's something that beyond just the two of you. You see, today, we live in the day and age where marriage is taken very lightly and divorce is taken very lightly. I was googling yesterday on divorce and the first few entries for key word searches results, are that you can divorce for 1,500 dollars, call this law firm, call this company and so on, you can do it easily. The idea the world has is divorce is simple, it's something convenient, it's just a piece of paper. We can sign a prenup by the way before we get married, so that we don't have to agonize over our settlement. But when you enter marriage with a prenup, you are saying, we're not going to be one, there will come a day when we we're going to separate.

00:37:44

And so what happens when a couple has this kind of ideas in marriage, it misrepresents Christ and His church and you enter a marriage with this mindset, I will be married to her as long as she pleases me, I will be married to him as long as he pleases me. But as long as we're not going to be satisfied with each other, I am miserable, she is miserable, let's all put ourselves out of misery by divorce. Or we may say, I know I am married to him, but you know what, I've fallen in love with another man. That means, I can separate and divorce. Now, all that is failing to live up to what God wants in marriage and that is, our marriage should be a permanent relationship because that depicts the covenant relationship between Christ and His church.

00:38:35

So, in these three ways, I believe marriage is when mystery of the gospel becomes majesty. 1. Sacrifice. 2. Submission. 3. Steadfastness, the two of them working together. And I hope you realize today and this is all I want you to know, I hope that you would know today, what keeps you marriage going is not just partnership, procreation, pleasure, but it's about portrayal. You are representing God, you are depicting the gospel of Jesus Christ. It's something greater, is something far grander, you should have a vision for something cosmic and do you realize that when you have a strong marriage, it's an eye-opener to people around and causes people to set up and ask you the reason why. I am surrounded, actually in my life, with people who have broken marriages. And I think you too. I would dare say, almost every one of you, would know someone, close to you who have gone through divorce. And it is imperative, in this day and age where divorce is just climbing, Christians, the church should live out the gospel in our homes and in our families and they would ask you for the reason why, what is the secret of your marriage and you say, it's not me, it's not my wife, it's Jesus Christ. He loved us so, and that's why we are at it in our marriage, all glory be to God. You know what, that's a tremendous testimony to all around us. We often say, live the gospel, give the gospel. It is when you live the gospel in your homes, that you have the opportunity and the freedom to share and give the gospel.

00:40:38

Am I saying today, don't value partnership, don't value pleasure, am I saying we throw it, no, I'm not saying that. Those are tremendous gifts of marriage, God gave it to us, enjoy it, savor it, but let that not be your primary driver, let God be your primary driver and when you seek God first all these things shall be added unto you. If you're single today, I close with this application, if you are a single today, if you're not married and you somehow feel that you are second-rate, everybody is getting married, I am not married. Somehow, I just don't have a desire to be married or I don't see the need to be married, please, don't think of yourself as second-rate. If you understand, marriage is to glorify God in the gospel, you can also do the same in your singlehood, you can, Paul did.

00:41:30

I am going maybe to spend the sermon looking at singlehood in due time but I just want to encourage you, it's about living for the glory of God, it's not about having a spouse so that I can be like someone else, it's about living the gospel. And if you're looking for a spouse, if you're getting married today, know why you're getting into marriage. You may be hoked into marriage because of, call that falling in love, she's pretty, he's handsome, I need a companion. Well, it can be for all that, but realize, once you commit to a marriage, you are demonstrating a powerful spiritual reality and let that drive your marriage.

00:42:06

If you are struggling in marriage, like most of us do, remember, "Marriage is really, really tough and only Jesus is enough." I mean, how can I love my wife this way, as Christ did, how can I submit to my husband, the way the church should? Nothing less than the grace of God through the gospel. So, marriage is really, really tough and only Jesus is enough." May God bless your family, may God bless your marriages to be a fragrant aroma to all around you. Let's bow for a word of prayer.

00:42:40

I like us this morning just to spend a few moments to reflect upon our marriages. If you're single, to reflect upon your singlehood. It's not that God doesn't love you, but maybe He wants to be glorified even through your singlehood. There's nothing wrong with that. But, if you are married today, consider why, you are married. Maybe, it has never crossed your mind, you are a picture to the world about the gospel. Maybe you feel like giving up, maybe you are disgusted with your spouse and that's because you have been looking at all the wrong things, you look at his worthiness, you look at her loveliness, they will not last and they are not strong enough. It's Christ, and His love. In this quietness, in this moment, I like you to concentrate on yourself. Don't think about what she should do or what he should do, think about what I should be doing, how I should change and how I should run to Jesus today for a change life.

00:44:05

Maybe today you are here, for the first time. Can I tell you, this focus on the family, is really not focusing on the family, it's focusing on Jesus, because, He alone, is the only One, who can strengthen and salvage your marriage. Remember, marriage is really, really tough and only Jesus is enough. As the music starts, I just want to give you this minute or two, right where you are, you don't have to speak to your wife, you don't speak to your husband, just you and God. What is, what is God saying to you? Are you going to walk out of the service, without any decision, without any desire to change? Then maybe, we have wasted our time. But if you have decided, and you want to change, you want to live out the gospel in your family, I praise God together with you, it's the work of the Holy Spirit, to change your home, to beautify it and to make it glorious. When a husband decides to love his wife, regardless of how she reacts or response, he is sanctifying her, he is making the holy, without blemish, beautiful. And when the wife submits to her husband, with a quiet and submissive spirit, she is enabling him, to lead as Christ should lead and would lead, what a beautiful day it would be. But when we are there, grabbing for ourselves, wanting our spouse to meet our needs, countless strifes and unhappiness arises. Marriage, is where the ministry of the gospel is seen as majesty through the couple. May your marriage be one that is majestic and beautiful. Father, we thank You for Your Word. Bless it to all our hearts. Glorify Yourself through our lives, through our marriages. May Jesus be seen, may we today learn to be broken and humble before Your presence, that we would come to Christ, for that love and motivation to be the man and woman You want us to be. So dear Lord, we present our homes to You, bless them for your own Name sake. We asked in Jesus name, Amen.