Since young, I was a believer of self, that input leads to output, and if I tried hard enough, I would achieve my goals. This approach seemed to work for most of my life, and while friends invited me to a couple of church services as a teenager, I never felt the need for a religion, nor believed that God existed. 

When I was studying abroad, my friend invited me to her church and introduced a lovely Christian couple, who suggested that I attend a discovery course with them. I had many questions and doubts about the existence of God and the accuracy of the bible. I was very touched by their effort and hospitality of this couple, and they did answer a lot of my questions, but by the end of the course, I had my doubts, to which they said "at some point, you need to have faith". I didn't have faith and my heart was hardened.

My life continued to be smooth sailing and it was not until much later in life, that I realized there were indeed things I had no control over, no matter how hard I tried. After multiple miscarriages, I was invited by a friend to attend a sermon on the topic of miscarriages. I believe this was the turning point for me.

I would say that I am an optimist, so it was not that I needed to find comfort or hope from a religion, but after reading the Bible for myself, I suddenly felt the desire to keep seeking. I started asking the same questions as before, but the difference this time around was the genuine interest to seek, and an open heart to listen (which I now believe is God's work and His timing for me). I was deeply blessed in my journey of seeking God. I thank God for placing so many godly people in my life to guide me along this journey; especially seeing them as living testimonies. 

I cannot say that my life has been smooth sailing after believing in Jesus, and while I did not begin this journey to seek comfort and joy, I now end the journey of seeking to know and trusting that God knows best and does what is best for me, and comfort and joy are just the natural by-products of this knowledge. I may not always receive what I pray for, but I do not feel lacking in anything. 

"And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28